User Reviews
Rating: really liked it
I loved Giffin's first two books,
Something Borrowed and
Something Blue, so I had high hopes for this book. Instead I was left with a resentful disappointment.
Firstly, why is it that novels set in NYC
have to be gushing odes to the city? This book name drops worse than a D-lister trying to get into a hot Hollywood club. Restaurants, street names, the Brooklyn Bridge - there's even a paragraph devoted to the skyline post-9/11. WE GET IT. THE BOOK IS SET IN NEW YORK.
The plot is ludicrous, formulaic, and trite. Woman decides she never wants children, meets man with same view, marries said man, said man changes his mind. After a brief argument, she packs up, moves out, and files for divorce. Literally overnight.
Claudia, the protagonist, is annoying, to say the least. Self-centered, whiny, and narcissistic. Her two sisters are cardboard stereotypes - Daphne married her high school sweetheart, teaches grade school, and is desperate yet unable to conceive. Maura married the good-looking slick talker and lives in a mansion, drives a luxury SUV, has catered birthday parties for her children, and turns a blind eye to her philandering scumbag of a husband.
Don't even get me started on the mother. I wanted to shoot her in the face.
In sum, if you like Giffin's earlier stuff, skip this one.
Rating: really liked it
I have mixed feelings about this book.
I had picked this up as the third novel by Ms. Giffin, having already read her first two ( Something Borrowed, Something Blue). All the characters in her books seem to be somewhat interrelated, and the back cover looked interesting, especially since I, like the heroine, am a thirty-something woman exceedingly tired of being asked when I will have children. Like Katherine Hepburn, I suspect I am just far too selfish to make a decent mother, and I think it should reflect WELL on me that I know this and don't have kids, not POORLY on me that I am actualized enough to realise this before they were born.
I was very happy with the beginning of the book. Boy and Girl Meet, Boy and Girl Don't Want Kids, Boy and Girl Get Married, Have Lovely No Kid Life. I was thrilled to finally have a literary heroine. But then, for me, the book took a disappointing turn.
*Spoiler Alert*
I realise in real life that many times people make the decision that the love of their life is more important, or that some women do decide later that they want children. But for those of us who purchased the book thrilled that a woman was finally taking a stand and saying "I don't want kids and I refuse to make excuses or be embarrassed by it", it was a great disappointment at the end of the book that she took her husband back and seemed to be waffling on the baby issue. There are some things I don't think one SHOULD compromise on, and for once I would really like to have seen the heroine take the hardline stance, whether she got the husband back or not.
Since one of the fundamental reasons I purchased the book was defeated through an overly cautious plot choice by the author, I need to knock stars off (you can't do half stars, this would be 3.5). However, the writing is up to Giffin's normal standards, and it's a fast, easy, engaging read.
Rating: really liked it
Ugh. It's very rare that I get this pissed off by a book, especially such random chick lit. This review contains spoilers, so don't read anymore if you ever plan to read this book.
Ok, here goes:
The story was about a NYC couple, Ben & Claudia, that are madly in love. They both agreed before marriage that they never want kids, but after a close friend had a baby, Ben changes his mind. It's out of the question for Claudia, and since neither will compromise, they promptly divorce. (and this was the fastest divorce I ever heard of, fictional and all!) No counseling, no conversations, nothing - just divorce.
Claudia then starts dating this hot guy from work and after he takes her to Lake Como and gives her this wonderful cocktail ring, she decides that she doesn't want to be with him. (WTH?!!! The only way I wouldn't want to be with him after this would be if I met George Clooney at Lake Como!) Nope, she decides that she wants Ben back and will do anything, even have a baby, to get him back. This is where I really got pissed off at the author - I'm all for twists in a book, but really?! You portray this strong, successful woman that wouldn't back down on her stand and now she leaves a good relationship and will sacrifice everything she believes in for her ex? Why didn't they explore counseling instead of just getting a divorce? Why couldn't she have watched her sister's kids and had a change of heart? Or make her fall in love with the new man, to only find out he has a child, then what would she do? I'm no author, but I definitely could have thought of a better twist or plotline. I felt conned. But not as conned as this future fictional baby would - "mommy never wanted you, she just wanted daddy."
The other plotlines in the story were also ridiculous. Her best friend always dates bad guys and right now she's with a married man. To keep him, she tricks him into a pregnancy. Now this friend is also friends with Claudia's sisters - one that's desperate to have a baby, the other has been cheated on multiple times by her husband. Why would these 2 sisters even be friends with her, it's like she's rubbing it in their faces?! She ends up miscarrying and then dumped by the married guy, but no worries, as she ends up in a serious relationship about 2 minutes later.
The sister that wants babies asks Claudia for eggs and the plot goes like this: let me think about it, maybe, no because I'm saving all my eggs for when I get Ben back! But that's ok too, because she meets a very pregnant teenager at the shoe store around Thanksgiving and adopts her baby right in time for Christmas! And both birth parents are tall, so the baby won't be short like his adopted dad!
Ben refuses to cooperate with Claudia when she doesn't want kids, but takes her back no matter if they have kids or not. Ummm, so you divorced over this but now it's all okay? Good grief, I hope they never have babies because they might change their mind and not want it, give it away, and then ask for it back again.
Claudia also bad mouthed the cheating brother-in-law, but when her sister temporarily forgives him, all is okay with him, he's not that bad.
The author had some witty lines and would probably be okay if this was a short story. I think she wanted to please all the readers and not try to stir up controversy, but she managed to annoy me to no end.
Jodi Piccoult could take a very controversal issue and still give a satisfying ending without pissing off a lot of people, I wish this author can learn something from her. I picked this up at a yard sale (thank God I didn't pay a lot for this or I'd be really annoyed!) along with her other books - they're all going directly into my yard sale pile, I'm not wasting my time again.
Rating: really liked it
I'm only a few pages in and I'm hooked. This woman is me, plain and simple. I'm sitting here wondering when Emily Griffin found the time to sit down and write a book all about me. I'm really hoping the main character doesn't sell out in the end to garner the mass-appeal of chick-lit readers. If she does, I might have to swear off Ms. Griffin for good. So far, though, she understands me, which lets me know that there are other women out there who feel exactly the way I do about the prospect of having kids...which is (insert obnoxiously loud vomitting noises here).
Later...SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
So, I finished it. Normally, I'm not the sort to bash a book because I'm butt-sore about the ending, but this one struck a chord with me. The heroin decides that she'll have a baby if that's what it takes to get her husband back?! I'm guessing that to even things out, the husband decides that he'd live without a child to be with her, but...that's what the agreement was between them to begin with. Living without a child is reversible. Having one is NOT.
The moral of the story is "You'll do ANYTHING for the one you truly love." WTF?!! Really?! Because I'm not jumping off a cliff or doing anything else I can't reverse (especially something that I truly do not want to do that will forever alter my destiny and the destiny of a heretofore nonexistent, innocent HUMAN FUCKING BEING) just because the one I love says that it would please them. This is our LIVES we're talking about here! Why would she put this out there as if it was ok?!
We didn't need a happy ending here. In reality, there was no good ending for these two. It was a tragedy from the begininng. Griffin didn't have to put that "you have to be willing to do anything in order to keep your man" bullshit out there for young girls and women to read. It's already everywhere we look and has been FOREVER! Feminism is a thing that happened out of necessity to change the culture by introducing the radical idea that the sexes are equal in their value! Relationships and marriages are based on equality and MUTUAL love and respect now, not that roll-over-and-do-whatever-he-tells-you-to crap from olden times.
All in all, I enjoyed reading the book until the end, which is the ONLY reason it got two stars instead of one. It seemed like a complete sell-out on Griffin's part...as I predicted. It's always fine to throw non-childbearing women under the bus in the end of novels, tv shows, and movies. They almost always end up disregarding their own wishes for their lives and giving in...because that's the way it is written. I wish SOMEONE would write something in which a woman is simply OKAY with not having children that she DOES NOT WANT!
We women are not BORN to sell-out and give in EVERY time some man (or woman or other significant other) asks for something they don't wish to give. Young girls should stop being subliminally told otherwise in everything they read or watch on television and in all the media they consume from the time they are old enough to understand language onward. Shame on you, Griffin. You have shamed yourself, your vagina, and all of womankind with this one.
Rating: really liked it
Emily Giffin has the literary capacity to create the most aggravating, unlikable characters in all of chick-lit that I positively can't
stand and yet somehow by the end of the novel I am empathising with and rooting for every single one. She gets me
every time and quite frankly I'm sick of your shit, Giffin!
I'm going to come right out and say it: people who say they don't want children astound me. It's fine! I respect it! It just really surprises me. So I struggled to grasp the concept of this book for a long time: a 35 year-old woman abandons her incredibly happy marriage because she simply refuses to have the child her husband desperately wants. She didn't want to discuss adoption either. It just seemed really extreme to me. The couple in this book are financially sound, in their thirties, with stable careers, a good home, and in a happy, loving marriage... in a way Claudia's decision almost seemed
immature.Anyway, I got on board. She got a divorce, she ploughed ahead as a baby-hating, workaholic singleton, and I was with her the whole way, until suddenly it became very clear to me how the book was going to end - (view spoiler)
[she was going to give in and have a baby after all. (hide spoiler)] And then I was pissed. Okay? I was really irritated. I'd had to put up with all her whiny shit and her outrageous decision to divorce her wonderful husband, and now she was going back on everything. After all that I'd been through!
In the end I remembered this was chick-lit. And that it was a bloody good ride. And I hate Emily for making me love this kind a crap. But I love it, I do.
Rating: really liked it
“There are no absolutes in relationships. You can't take anything for granted. You can count on absolutely nothing but the unexpected. You only get in trouble when you start thinking that you're some kind of exception to the rule.”
― Emily Giffin, Baby Proof
I chose this because the premise seemed interesting. I too chose not to have children as did many of my friends. So I wanted to read this and I had already read the "Something Borrowed" series.
While not quite up to that level, I did enjoy this book about choices and the ramifications of the ones we make. I thought the book was quite realistic.
As a woman myself, I cannot even say how many times that same question has been asked.."don't you want kids" and it has been asked to many of my friends who are childless too. It does get annoying and I could relate to the heroine.
I also was reading this while in the waiting room at a doctor's office. The receptionist saw what I was reading, (I'd just started) and said to me, "you are going to love this book"! We then talked about the book a bit. She was a major fan. That was pretty cool.
SPOILERS:
I did not have any issues with the ending at all. The book went pretty much like I'd have predicted and it moved at a brisk fresh pace. Baby Proof was a pretty good read anmd an interesting one at that. Highly recommended.
Rating: really liked it
Yet another Emily Giffin novel, and I think it was okay for the most part. The thing I HATE about Giffin as a writer is she makes a really interesting, difficult scenario that makes you sympathize with her characters, and then she can't think of how to solve the moral dilemma, so near the end of her books she pulls something COMPLETELY horrible, whether it's a cliché plot development or a seriously erroneous logical argument for making her characters change motives (an anti-feminist/anti-individualist argument in this case). The fact that one of her (good) characters references Romeo and Juliet as an example of true love is truly sickening, and yet this is the turning-point argument that makes one of her main characters change their mind on a crucial issue. Ugh. Other than that, which for a while seriously made me want to just stop reading since I could see where the story was about to go, the rest of the book is decent for its genre.
Rating: really liked it
This book annoyed me. I couldn't figure out why at first, and then I realized it - I don't agree with the author's message. The protagonist spends the whole book trying to get over her ex-husband who left her because she didn't want children. In the end, they reconcile because while she still doesn't want children, she'd consider having them to be with her soulmate.
I think that is a selfish notion - yes, it seems unselfish to procreate because you love your husband so much and that is what he wants. And to me that works for everything ("I'll convert for you", "I'll live in Des Moines for you") EXCEPT children. Because a child should be wanted and loved by both parents for the family unit to work.
Enough ranting - go read Something Borrowed instead.
Rating: really liked it
This is one of the WORST books I have ever read. Please do not torture yourself.
Rating: really liked it
D This book reminded me of why I don't like chick lit -- unrealistic expensive Manhattan lifestyles obsession with finding love partner. Anyway, this seemed more promising -- a woman finds a man who also doesn't want kids (yay! Perfect for me--like T!) and then he changes his mind, and the whole drama. An ending to gag over.
Rating: really liked it
Usually, I tend to shy away from books in the chick lit genre. When I saw "Baby Proof" on the shelf, I was instantly drawn to this book for some reason. After reading the book jacket, I knew this was definitely going to be an interesting read to say the least.
Claudia and Ben are the perfect couple...at least to everyone around them anyway. Claudia is a successful book editor and Ben is a successful architect who are both enjoying their married childfree life. Although they both agreed in the dating stage that neither wants to have children, the issue come back up when the find out that their mutual friends are going to have a baby. Claudia sticks to her guns about not wanting children but Ben is now not so sure and decides he may want kids after all. Claudia forces Ben to make a choice in the matter; either be happy and childfree with her or be single and have a child with someone else. Once they realize that neither one is willing to compromise, they get a divorce.
During their separation and divorce, Claudia does a lot a soul searching to figure out why she doesn't want kids. She likes kids (loves her niece and nephews) yet she doesn't view herself as the motherly type. I completely share the same opinion as Claudia when it comes to kids. I like kids but can I see myself as mother? Not so much.Fortunately, she has a great support system to help her figure out her feelings on both side of the issue which include her friend Jess as well as her sisters Daphne and Maura.
Also during Claudia and Ben's time apart, she begins to question whether or not he really was her soulmate. After all, if he was her soulmate, wouldn't her want the same things she wants in life? Should she be willing to compromise what she wants for the man she loves? Are children the ultimate deal breaker in marriage?These are just some of the questions that are tackled in this book.
While I was planning on just skimming through this book, I could not put it down. It was very well written and the characters were extremely thought out. The dialogue was realistic as well as the situations that occurred within the book. I really enjoyed this book and am happy with the way the book ended. Having read this book, I think I might give Chick Lit or at least other books written by Emily Giffin, another try.
Rating: really liked it
If you picked this up because you loved Something Borrowed/Something Blue, don’t bother. This may as well have been written by a completely different author...and a far less talented one. This was paint by the numbers, with dated/occasionally borderline offensive ideas and main characters who don’t seem to care as much as they claim they do. The main conflict isn’t really resolved- and it felt like a cowardly choice to keep every possible reader somewhat happy. The only vaguely compelling character was one of the sisters, and of course, she’s made fun of and made to seem lesser than because that’s how these books work. There is no complicated story here to work out where everyone is at fault a little. I don’t want the HEA for the people the book wants it for- in fact I don’t think it is an HEA. I can’t even get started on all the reasons why- but the author’s seeming sympathy to the “but if you love a man enough, you’ll have kids for him!!” argument- regardless of how the end turned out- was pretty much a see-red dealbreaker for me.
So yeah....Reverse course to her first two and call it a day.
Rating: really liked it
As I've read and enjoyed each of Emily Giffin's other books, I fully expected to enjoy this book. It was definitely not the case. Most of Giffin's characters are smart, educated, professional women; they are also strong - in that they don't necessarily fall full-force into a stereotypical "I'll compromise my goals and ideals in order to keep a man." In fact, even though her protagonist in "Heart of the Matter" decides to take her cheating husband back, Giffin still manages to paint the wronged wife as one who is preserving her marriage on her terms, with none of the Elizabeth Edwards-style "stand by her man" bull.
Unfortunately Claudia is no such woman. She starts off well, in that she makes no apologies for not wanting children, has very good reasons for doing so, and leaves her husband when he decides that he just can't live without procreating. However, midway through the novel Claudia abruptly can't stand her new boyfriend (even though he was amazing until he gives her a perfectly lovely birthday gift - makes sense, right?), starts reflecting on her ex husband (who comes across as a short, whiny little man who pouts when he doesn't get his way; the christening scene literally made me wrinkle my nose in disgust at him), and after realizing that one of her novelists (a man, no less) is "telling me to have a baby to get Ben back" - admits that it's "just about the worst advice I've ever heard" (maybe because it flies in the face of what any self-respecting woman in this century would do) - decides to throw what she wants aside and consider having a baby just to get her ex back.
I seriously felt like I just walked in on a husband smacking his wife around, with her insisting "But this is proof that he loves me! He wouldn't do it if he didn't care!"
I won't be finishing the book (a glance at the end told me she was back with Ben and breathily contemplating motherhood). I also won't be purchasing another novel of Emily Giffin's.
Rating: really liked it
RTC check out latest update for end of book feelings. I think I'm going to eviscerate this book.
Warning, I'm probably going to tear this book up. I dunno. It's not that I didn't like it, exactly. It's that I didn't like Claudia and as a main character she was very unlikable. So I might rant. A lot.
Let me get out my
notes that I wrote right after I finished this book.
Alright here we go. I'm sorry but I have to say it. This author can't write. At least not in a way I appreciate. The way the book is written is very matter-of-fact and very it's already happened. We aren't living it with the h. I
hate when authors do this and I prefer to live the emotions with the narrator when they are happening. And especially when they are in first person POV? Come on, we don't need a retelling.
Here is an example of telling:
He was super hot.
Showing:
He has a wide square jaw, a hint of stubble on his face, and a smoldering smirk that really caught my eye.
The way this author worded things, it just wasn't enough to capture the moment, I didn't feel emotionally invested or connected to Claudia. I kept expecting the book to change gears. I honestly thought that Claudia was giving us a recap of how she got to a specific point in the book, but unfortunately that's not what happened. I expected Claudia to give that recap and then us to start living
with her. Not learning almost second hand about her thoughts.
The whole book is basically a monologue of her life. Very few interactions with dialogue. I long for dialogue and while there is some, most of the events get glossed over toward the end of the event. We get a glimpse and move forward.
Aside from my overall annoyance at the writing style of the book, I also did
not like Claudia. I don't feel like she has any redeeming qualities. She's book smart, and she's in publishing, but she isn't the nicest person in her head at all. I mean I know most of us have weird thoughts (no? just me? lol) but I felt like Claudia almost thought she was better than a lot of people. Claudia has so many notions on things it's nuts. Little things where she assumes things without being a 35 year old adult and talking and communicating with people. She takes things at face value and then infers it into her mind something completely different that might or might not have actually happened.
Claudia is married to Ben. All throughout her life Claudia has not wanted any children. It became a contentious point with her previous boyfriends, even starting as far back as High School. For real though, why would you talk babies in high school? Anyways she thought she and Ben were ok and a united front on that issue. They were living the dream, and Claudia was happy. Then Ben's friend had a baby and he started to press the issue. So much so that Claudia decides to go spend the night with her friend, but Ben doesn't call. And neither does she. Her family start saying do you
really not want to have kids? Her family is constantly on her back for not wanting to have kids, and it kind of drove me nuts. Just leave her the fuck alone! She does not need to have a child if she doesn't want to. Ben and Claudia divorce.
Claudia starts dating a dude from work and they go on an awesome trip to some place she and Ben were supposed to go for their 5th anniversary. Richard, gives her a ring and instead of thinking it's nice and the coolest thing that someone could get her. She feels lost, and apparently somehow still in love with Ben. WHAT?
Yep. A friend of hers casually says something profound that makes Claudia think she will have Ben's baby if that's what it takes.
Seriously. No, I'm not kidding. Nope. Still not kidding. This entire book revolves around Claudia
NOT WANTING KIDS and she's going to go back to Ben? What an utter waste of time. Seriously. I thought she was either A. going to get pregnant by boyfriend or B. Get married to a boyfriend and find out with the right person she'd have a kid. Something like that. I never expected Ben and Claudia to get back together.
Oh and the greatest thing is that there is a Reading Group Guide. And I'm going to answer all the questions. :D So here we go for that.
Do you think there is a stigma against women who do not become mothers? If so, how much more damning is it for a woman who chooses not to have children rather than one who is simply unable? Do you think women who don't want children are judged more harshly than men who don't?
Boy that is a giant question. I do not think there is a stigma against women who do not want to become mothers. At least not by what I have seen in my personal life around me. I think that there was at one point a stigma, but I don't think it is big of a deal now, today as it once was. Um? Damning? To whom? It's her choice to not have children that includes any type of child. A person who is unable to have their own biological child still has options and choices available to them. I do think women who don't want children are judged more harshly than men who don't
because we are female. It goes against the societal norms of women wanting to be a mother, and wanting to have a baby as the next stage of their life. If women don't have children then they aren't female enough. Or something like that.
Do you view Claudia as a selfish person? How much do you think she is defined by her decision not to have children? Was your first impression of her a favorable one?Did you draw conclusions about her character after the first sentence of the novel?
Do I view Claudia as a selfish person for not wanting to have kids? No. I don't. Do I view Claudia as a selfish person overall, not really actually. She was open and honest up front about her intentions with regards to children from the beginning. I do think in this book that Claudia was defined by her decision not to have children because the people she surrounded herself with were not like minded individuals. I was kind of bummed that Claudia didn't have one friend who wasn't baby crazy. She should have had a fellow no babies for me in common female friend. And she didn't. Claudia and the story could have benefited from that. My first impression of Claudia were great up until she started making assumptions of people and being judgmental. I had no problems with her not wanting children and wanted just to see where this story was going. Did I draw conclusions about her character after the first sentence? About her not wanting children? No, I didn't.
Do you think that most people would see a partner who doesn't want children as a deal-breaker? Is this an issue that one can compromise on? Is there such a thing as a deal-breaker when it comes to true love, or does true love conquer all?
OMG. Really? Yes I do see most people who have a partner who doesn't want children as a deal breaker. Children are important to some people and not to others. I think that if Claudia had wanted children just a little bit that yes compromise could have happened. However, because she didn't actually want a child, never had a burning need to have a child, said nope nope and nope to kids is not going to change her mind. I think you can only compromise on it if it was an interest for you to begin with, because Claudia said no all her life I'd say there'd be zero compromise and I think it's selfish of Ben to expect after all these years that Claudia give him a baby. No true love will not conquer all. I'm a realist, and if one partner harasses and forces the other to have a baby then you will create resentment and strain in the relationship. There are all kinds of deal breakers that people can't get past.
Anyways I'm done answering these questions there's like 6 more. But I feel like having these questions try to make this book into more than it is. I feel like the author was trying too hard to get a lesson across, but then it fell flat once she put Claudia and Ben back together. They never resolved the issue they divorced about aka having children. How can I accept them back together and her sudden willingness to have a child with Ben
for Ben. Like this doesn't sound good in terms of bonding with a child. Yes force someone who doesn't want kids of her own to have her own kids in order to keep the man she loves. Great lesson. And the story was inane. I just didn't like how she told the story.
I'll give it a 2 because I finished the stupid thing. I don't even need to mention really anyone else because they really don't matter in the grand scheme of things.
Rating: really liked it
It's quite a brave topic to tackle - women who don't want children. In this day and age, I think it's almost the last taboo. But it is the topic that author
Emily Giffin addresses in
"Baby Proof".
Knowing that the story would focus on this issue, I worried it would end up being black and white with a watered down and easily digestible ending but
Emily Giffin kept to her usual high standard as I read my way through a messy, emotional, complicated and realistic story.
Despite such a sensitive and emotive topic, there were plenty of lighter moments and like her other books,
"Baby Proof" feels like chick-lit-with-bite. It's simply more than humourous fluff. Enjoyable and recommended.
