User Reviews
Rating: really liked it
"You gave it three stars?" she asked me, biting her lip and holding her breath.
"Yes," I finally answered with my marble lips, cold yet strangely comforting, even warm. "Stephenie, don't forget to breathe."
"Oh, of course." A storm seemed to rage in her for just a moment.
"I gave it a three. It's good." I would never lie to her, could never lie to her. Yet, somehow, she felt it was a lie and brooded in stillness for a moment that seemed to last an eternity.
Finally, I broke the aching silence. "I gave it a three because the vampire lore was that good -- the extended plotline and the setup for a decent fourth novel were all enjoyable." There, I said it. Would it be enough for her? No, it would never be enough.
"But you absolutely hated the tent scene with the [spoiler removed:], and you wanted to send Bella straight to vampire hell for her self-absorbed, self-indulgent, self-obsessed self-ness by the end."
We paused and I noticed sobs erupting from deep inside her.
"Stephenie, breathe, and stop biting your lip, it's getting really annoying. Quit with the crying already. Yes, all of those things are true, and if I could release myself from your books, I would. But-"
"But?" she asked longlingly, her fingers caressing my face while my fingers caressed her face and somebody else's fingers were somehow caressing both our faces because you can never have too much face-caressing going on -- whose fingers are those, anyway?
"But despite how much I hate Bella by now, I
really want to find out more about the Volturi and the process of becoming a vampire and whether Bella is somehow part of an ancient bloodline that stirs up all the vampires and werewolves whenever she's around. That's why I gave it three stars, and that's why-" I gasped, she gasped, we both forgot to breathe and bit our lips, "-why I will be reading the fourth book as soon as it is out."
Finally, I remembered to breathe and stopped caressing her face, looked into her eyes and with my godlike, cool, marble lips, asked, "Satisfied?"
Smiling, she answered, "Yes, very."
____________
Notes from James: If you like this one, you will probably also get a kick out of my original review of Book 1. Enjoy!
Rating: really liked it
It’s always Team Edward this and Team Jacob that, but there’s only one real team when it comes to reading the Twilight series. And that’s Team Suffering.
Honorable mention to Team Alice.
The only character I respect.
Everyone else is a nightmare gremlin demon, and also somehow the plot isn’t even fun, and also this book is no joke like 1,200 pages long. I’m pretty sure. Don’t fact check me.
You really have to wonder why we all stanned these books so hard in middle school. Were we depraved? What was wrong? Did we just need a juice box and a firm hug?
I don’t know, but it’s upsetting.
These books really do surprise you with their sheer ability to find new ways to be terrible. If in 50 years a CIA report is declassified outlining the use of this series as a torture mechanism for feminist women who would one day be forced to confront the ways their middle school favorite series traumatized them I wouldn’t be surprised.
In fact, that’s a more likely explanation than everyone spontaneously being horrible.
Like, Jacob kisses Bella without her consent and tries to manipulate her continuously. Charlie cheers him on for a taking-what’s-his mentality even though it’s HIS OWN KID. Edward kidnaps her when she doesn’t do what he tells her to do.
This sh*t is exhausting. WHY IS EVERYONE THE WORST.
But Bella is boring as hell so I don’t feel that bad for her. Honestly she needed some excitement forcibly injected into her life.
But there isn’t actually any excitement because HOWISTHISSOBORING. The plot doesn’t start until 55% and even then the action is nowhere close to arriving. The whole action sequence is probably about 0.43% of the page count. And for what, you might ask?
Easy. To make more time to talk about how important it is to wait until marriage before you get it on.
I mean, vampires who kill for pleasure, that’s all well and good, but personally I draw the line at premarital f*cking.
Edward literally looks Bella in the eyes and goes “your virtue :) I have to protect it :) everyone knows if you f*ck outside the bounds of holy matrimony you get locked out of heaven :)” and Bella’s just like no yeah sound logic that tracks goodnight!!!
It’s fun foreshadowing for how hard this poor girl has to work to get her husband to give it to her in the next book. I cannot emphasize enough the extent to which I would burn everything to the ground in her shoes.
One cool thing about this book is that if you were worried about the weird comparing-the-adult-you-love-to-a-child motif being over since Bella and Edward are firmly in <3 now...you don’t have to be!
We get everything we need in Rosalie’s tragic backstory, during which she tells us that she’s sexually and romantically interested in Emmett because he reminds her of her friend’s baby.
This series really stays giving us everything.
Including basic errors and overdramatic writing techniques all in one, like when on one page Jacob says “what’s it like having a werewolf for a best friend?” and on the next page there’s a big dramatic moment where he can’t say the word werewolf…
Basically what I’m trying to tell you is that this book sucks.
Bottom line: See above.
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pre-reviewthis book is 629 pages long, and i felt every single one of them.
review to come / 1 star?
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currently-reading updatesamazing that stephenie meyer wrote a romance about murderous vampires and moral priority #1 is No Sex Before Marriage
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edward: bella is so hot :) she's a child, but in a hot way :)
rosalie: wow look at that guy getting eaten by a bear :) he looks like my best friend's baby :) and that's sexy to me :)
me:
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tbr reviewonly one love triangle in literary history deserves rights
Rating: really liked it
Ohhh yeah, I made a BookTube Video all about my scandalously unpopular twilight opinions (check out the video to see it...if you dare.)
Anyway, onwards to the review!
Isabella Swan? I promise to love you forever - every single day of forever. Will you marry me?
I can feel my teenage heart quivering I'm gonna fight for you, until your heart stops beating.
That heart just explodedWhewwwww. Ten years ago, I would've fought anyone who challenged Edward and Bella's love. Nowadays? Not quite as fervently, but I will still go head-to-head on this one.
In case you've been under a rock for the last decade, Edward (the sparkling vamp) loves Bella (the clumsy human) who loves Jacob (the hot-headed werewolf) but
ONLY AS A FRIEND (ha!). Annnd that's pretty much it.
There's some background stuff - evil vampire assembling an army to wipe out Bella, Bella accidentally breaking her bones, the Volturi threatening to kill Bella if she isn't turned into a vampire, yada yada...but
MORE IMPORTANTLY she has to finally choose - once and for all.
Let's examine
the evidence: 
Okay, okay.
Joking aside...Let's just say, reading this as an adult has shifted my perspective (slightly). I was
totally oblivious to things that are
glaringly obvious. Chock it up to being a YA while reading YA lit.
Yes, their love is
frighteningly codependent - especially taking Edward's age into considerations. Isn't the rule half your age plus seven?
And yes, the love triangle is so
incredibly over-the-top - you have on one side a
normal teenage boy and on the other...A psychotically obsessed
ex-murdering stalker. Annnnd yes, Bella is a
bit of a limp noodle when it comes to heroism and her clumsiness is so extreme that she needs to get her head checked. Honestly, Victoria should've just scattered a bag of marbles in Bella's bedroom and waited for the human to trip and die.
But, hats off to nostalgia because
I still had fun reading this one. I'm no longer super obsessed teen but I still adore this series.
P.s. Anyone else seen the Hillywood Eclipse Parody? Freaking love it.
The 2018 PopSugar Reading Challenge - A book set in the decade you were bornAudiobook CommentsThe reader (Ilyana Kadushin) was alright. Not the best, not the worst.
YouTube | Blog | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | Snapchat @miranda_reads
Rating: really liked it
Honestly at this point I really love getting to spend time with Bella, Edward, and Jacob. They’re all silly and I love them.
Rating: really liked it
My notes to characters in
Eclipse:
Bella: I'm so done with you. You're a self-absorbed little snot. You're not a strong modern woman because you don't want to be a teen bride, and you're not cute because you fall down a lot.
Alice: You're so not cute either.
Jacob: What you did is called "date rape," buckaroo. And to think I liked you best until the middle of this book!
Edward: Checking the brood-o-meter... yep, you're still no David Boreanaz.
Leah (the one lady-wolf): I don't understand why you're getting the short end of the stick just because you had your heart broken... everyone seemed to cut Bella enough slack in the last book for a lot less. Sucks to be a supporting female character in these books, huh?
Note to Stephenie Meyer: Even you must think the
Wuthering Heights references are a little over the top, right? Oh, and all your acknowledgements? Well, you're not cute too.
Rating: really liked it
*sharp inhale*
trash trash trash trash trash trash trashThat's what this book is.
A dumpster fire.
A rubbish heap.
A garbage bin.
This is a series of events where Bella wants to do something and so she asks Edward, and Edward refuses so she doesn't do the thing. Like she needs permission from him to do what she wants.
Honey, he's a senior citizen, I don't think he and you should be in a relationship in the first place. Second of all, I believe you are a human of your own, and he doesn't own you.
But I guess Bella is too entranced with his marble skin and golden eyes and sharp cheekbones to care.
Every time Edward walks into the room, we have to go over all of this again. Over and over and over again. I
get it. I understand that he has skin. And a face. And hair.
Apparently only one person understands this, and that's Charlie Swan.
"I don't think you should dump all your other friends for your boyfriend, Bella," he said in a stern voice. "It's not nice, and I think your life would be better balanced if you kept some other people in it."
You see? He gets it.
"If you'd have had more of a life outside of Edward Cullen, it might not have been like that."
GET WRECKED, ISABELLE GOOSE.
I don't think Bella has enough brain cells to understand, but whatever. She and Edward combined only have half a personality.
DNF
0.2 stars; I added the extra 0.1 for Charlie
Rating: really liked it
I had expectations for this book, but I found it to be a terrible disappointment. Where to begin with?
First of all, I have lost most of the respect I had for Bella as a character. Her obsession for Edward has really gone overboard, to the point of becoming downright annoying, even unhealthy. She worships the ground he walks on, and is all too ready to dump her parents and friends just so she can spend more time with him without growing old. She doesn't seem to have any serious problem with the idea of making her parents worry, or the thought of never see them again... she's willing to stomp over anything that isn't Edward, even things that can enrich her life. She's like a satellite, her boring life revolving solely around him. She has no self-worth, and spends a good deal of the book whining, complaining and sighing, I really wanted to shake her hard at times and tell her to GET A LIFE.
I also find it deeply disturbing that Bella is not more repulsed by the idea of blood lust. How could she accept the thought that she will want to kill people (even her family) so easily, just because of him?
Second, Edward has gone from charming to BORING. There is such a thing as being too perfect (read: dull), and Edward fits the mold perfectly. His character is so flat, and how many times can we hear Bella and Edward exchange their love for one another before becoming bored? I mean honestly, how perfect can he be before it simply becomes ridiculous? Most of the book is spent on the two of them fawning over each other and Bella saying over and over and over again how sexy and good-looking he is. Writing tip for the author: You don't need to tell us countless times that your character is wonderful. Actions speak for themselves. Jane Austen didn't need to remind us several times that Mr. Darcy was perfect... he simply was.
Third... Jacob. He's the reason I gave this book 2 stars. He was the most compelling character in the book. He wasn't perfect, but he was fun, honest, and very human, making big mistakes, but always trying to do his best... he was impossible not to love. He was real, not a perfect pretty doll with no flaws. Sadly, he was mostly wasted.
I also the think the magic Twilight had dissapeared. I liked the books because the author made the whole vampire/werewolf thing so credible, but now, with armies of vampires raging through Washington, credibility has gone out the window. Also the whole book was focused on on a love triangle that everybody knew how it would end, and it made everything very predictable. And how come nobody saw that Victoria was behind the killings, when it was so darn obvious even to the casual reader? Were they stupid? Overall, a great disappointment, I'm not sure if I'll read the next book in the series. Why bother?
Rating: really liked it
snif. my link is worthless now.
this is the virgin daiquiri version of
wuthering heights, all watered down, plopped in a blender, and sitting at the folding card table with the kiddies.and they are all gulping it down without knowing that the real deal is way more fun.
elizabeth has probably written the best review this book could ever get, with much wittier analogies, so go read that, then come back here for some less-articulate complaints.
i messed up. i thought i would have a nice vacation, where i would have plenty of time and concentration to lounge over
our mutual friend. instead, there was drinking, and some self-pity, and vacation-langour, and i just couldn't give dickens the attention he deserves. you know who really doesn't deserve my complete attention? stephenie meyer.
and
why is that? because she has grievously misinterpreted one of my favorite books and has created this sort of chimera byproduct that you can see some of the source material in if you squint, but it's mostly just wrong.
i mean, at this point in everyone's lives, the world doesn't need
another eclipse review, right? so i am mostly going to just bitch about why this book misrepresents
wuthering heights and why that makes me cranky.
i suppose it is ambitious of her to have attempted to pepper her vampire romance novels with elements of better works of literature like, say, shakespeare and jane austen. she made the decision to try to shoehorn these characters into the mold of another book, and just didn't bother trying to fix the parts that overflowed or got stuck together.
but you can't get mad at a puppy for pissing on the rug.
and i knew what i was getting into.
before i started reading this, i was aware that this was the
wuthering heights installment of the series, so i was obligated to read it on those grounds alone, as i will read any retelling of w.h., for better or for worse. usually worse.
and elizabeth had warned me and warned me that meyer got w.h. all wrong and had reversed the roles of heathcliff and linton in a most embarrassing way, but at first, i saw no problems. bella was obviously catherine, edward was heathcliff the true love and jacob was linton,the more "appropriate" choice, right? done and done. i kept reading, shocked, thinking, "but elizabeth is never wrong! what gives??"
is she only basing this on appearance? on the superficial? edward is fair and wealthy and very understanding of bella's other ties - like linton (maybe not "understanding" in linton's case, but "ineffectual") and jacob is definitely darker-complected, like heathcliff, and tied to nature and the earth. but that shouldn't change the basic differences.
because obviously edward is the sun to bella's flower face. she cannot be without him - even an afternoon spent apart is unendurable and the intensity of their love is undeniable and unbreakable and blah and blah. jacob is her father's choice for her, which makes him linton, who is technically a better choice because there is less self-destructive passion, and choosing him allows her to remain, you know,
alive.
but let's back up.
because
wuthering heights was never a choice between two suitable men. it was a choice between passion and security. head and heart. and linton was never an
alternative to heathcliff, catherine always just wanted it all. it was never about love, not with linton.he was simply the path of least resistance, and a means to an end. securing him meant securing a place for heathcliff, whom she could never marry. but who needs marriage when your husband is much weaker than your lover?
so, in a more modern version of the story,it makes sense to do away with the financial angle, especially with characters this young. the conflict here is between soul and body. all bella has to do is choose humanity or immortality.easy-peasy. so the reversal of edward and jacob's fortunes didn't cause me too much grief, and still maintains the distinction between edward/heathcliff and jacob/linton. the root of the conflict is the same: to go with an all-consuming passion that "eclipses" one's own self and is potentially dangerous (for so so many reasons here) or to go with the one who feels more like "family," who has the paternal approval, who will allow her to remain a living breathing human and retain her entire life...except her passion.
fine. this still parallels w.h.
and the more specific details: heathcliff goes away while catherine recovers at the linton's. and then he goes on that much longer absence, plunging her into despair. so far, so good. edward leaves bella in
new moon and jacob steps in to be there for her and heals her and manages to stick a little bit of him in the space edward's leaving left.
but then it gets messy and too many of heathcliff's characteristics start leaking into jacob. because jacob is kind of a dick. forcing kisses, always smirking and pushing his boundaries.he takes much more delight in troublemaking and hurting his rival, and occasionally hurts bella,too. jacob is warm and furious and tied to the forest the way heathcliff is tied to the moors.
it is jacob who is the earthbound heathcliff she can remain a grubby child with. meyer rightly recognizes edward as the other half of bella's soul, but extracts all the physical, earthly passion from that role and gives it to jacob.edward protects her like a fine crystal object while his sister dresses her like a doll. what does this sound like?? linton linton linton!
bella as catherine is obviously the weakest here. she is nothing like catherine. she moans about not being good enough for edward. catherine was never "good" enough for linton, but did that stop her? she barreled in and took what she wanted and refused to leave. bella fusses over everyone and just wants everyone to be happy and self-sacrifices all over the place. i understand that bella's character has already been established in other books, but how can she compare herself to catherine with a straight face?? catherine is a goddamn honey badger. bella is a mother hen.
her relationship with edward certainly has elements that are unappealing - who wants to be watched and protected that closely all the time?, but at least i believed in their feelings because they are always reminding me and shoving my face in it.
jacob forces himself on her, laughs at her human weakness when she fights back, and tries to separate her from her happiness at every turn. it is both arrogant and insecure, but this is still somehow, but the one who is most "like family" who bella's dad wants her to be with. (do NOT get me started on "parental roles in the twilight saga.")(but quickly: our girl walks through the door from her vacation and already is making dinner for her father who supports some shirtless douchebag's forced kisses, but hates the rich boy who really wants to marry his daughter and preserve her virginity.) but this is another reversal to w.h., too since heathcliff was at least
raised as family, even if you don't interpret heathcliff as mr. earnshaw's bastad son. which is not a belief i personally subscribe to, but it is out there.
edward is patient and forgiving and gentle and willing to give bella the space she needs before making her decision before she is even aware there is a decision to make.come on - that can't be right!
heathcliff doesn't share. he can tolerate linton because he is weak and catherine would not have him harmed, but this vampire zen shit has no place in a heathcliff character, and isn't even a linton quality. that element is pure meyer.
in
wuthering heights, everyone behaves poorly.in this one, it is really just jacob as linton, i mean heathcliff, i mean jacob.
nonsense.
apart from any messing-with-the-heights stumbles, this also maintains all the lazy writing and comical details meyer interprets as passion: all the tooth grinding and clenching and chuckling and things said under the breath.oh, and snorting. why does everyone snort? and borrowing lines from
wuthering heights to help bolster your characters is like posing next to the chubby girl in photographs to look slimmer. we see your borrowed finery.
and the love triangle thing is pretty forced. bella herself doesn't even realize until the end that she is even in a love triangle, so how are we supposed to? honestly, i am aware that there is such a thing as "team jacob" because i am a citizen of the world, but god - what's the appeal in some pushy dude who won't take "no" for an answer??
and why do i excuse heathcliff all his sins? is it because the writing is better? is it because i believe in his love in a way i do not believe in bella? because when i think of heathcliff i feel a physical reaction in my heart. when i think of jacob, i roll my eyes.
i actually liked
twilight, despite its flaws.
new moon was boring and repetitive. this one was irritating because of how much i looove w.h.
there is no evil in this book - no revenge. the stakes are too low in the triangle.i picture the three of them at a bar:
oh, i made sure jacob would overhear my conversation with bella about our upcoming nuptials. snort chuckle. eeeevil! oh, i knew edward could read my mind so i thought about how sad bella was when he went away. clenched teeth, snort,eeeevil! oh, i married her husband's sister, alternately beating and ignoring her, raised my enemy's son to be an illiterate brute, and ruined everyone's lives while i mourned my one true love. (crickets... the sound of edward and jacob pissing themselves)
here is some exciting eclipse information for this year:
http://eclipse.gsfc.nasa.gov/eclipse....
and get on that venus one, because you're not gonna get another chance unless you are team edward.
and because this still makes me laugh:
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f03d...
i think i have probably made a point or two in that rant somewhere. i wasn't enraged, overall, not really, but it was a pretty bloated book and i really don't get all the love for this series...
oh, and a gross dedication:
to my husband pancho for your patience, love, friendship, humor, and willingness to eat out.TMI, stephenie meyer, TMI ...
come to my blog!
Rating: really liked it
Eclipse (Twilight #3), Stephenie Meyer Eclipse is the third novel in the Twilight Saga by American novelist Stephenie Meyer.
Bella finds herself in danger again. He has to choose between his love for Edward and his friendship with Jacob.
A choice, which can fuel the long-standing enmity between vampires and werewolves.
She has to make another decision as the high school exam date approaches: life or death! Which decision brings him death, and which choice brings life?
عنوانهای چاپ شده در ایران: «خسوف از مجموعه شفق»؛ «ماه گرفتگی»؛ نویسنده: استفنی مه یر؛ تاریخ نخستین خوانش روز چهاردهم ماه دسامبر سال2009میلادی
عنوان: خسوف - ادامه رمان ماه نو - کتاب سوم از مجموعه شفق؛ ماه گرفتگی؛ نویسنده: استفنی مه یر؛ مترجم: شهناز کمیلی زاده؛ کرج، در دانش، سال1388، در572ص؛ چاپهای دوم تا چهارم سال1388؛ چاپهای پنجم تا هشتم سال1389؛ شابک9789641740704؛ موضوع: داستانهای نویسندگان ایالات متحده آمریکا - سده21م
عنوان: ماه گرفتگی؛ نویسنده: استفنی مه یر؛ مترجم: فرشید قهرمانی؛ قزوین، سایه گستر، سال1388، در456 ص؛ شابک9789645024404؛
نقل از ابتدای متن کتاب: (بعضی میگویند: دنیا در میان آتش، به پایان میرسد، دیگران میپندارند در میان یخ، با طعمی که از اشتیاق و شور و شوق چشیده ام، با آنها که آتش را ترجیح میدهند، موافقم؛ ولی اگر بنا باشد دوباره از بین برود، فکر میکنم به اندازه ی کافی نفرت را میشناسم، که بگویم: برای ویرانی دنیا یخ نیز معرکه است، و کفایت میکند)؛ پایان نقل از «رابرت فراست» در ابتدای متن کتاب
کشتارهای زنجیره ای دهشتناکی، در شهر «سیاتل» رخ میدهند، زن خون آشام خبیثی، همچنان به جستجوی انتقام جویانه ی خود، ادامه میدهد؛ «بلا» بار دیگر، خود را، رودررو با خطر، میبیند؛ او باید، میان عشقی که به «ادوارد» دارد، و دوستی با «جاکوب»، یکی را برگزیند؛ گزینشی، که میتواند به دشمنی دیرینه ی خون آشامها، و گرگینه ها، دامن بزند؛ او مجبور است، با نزدیک شدن تاریخ امتحانات دبیرستان، تصمیم دیگری نیز بگیرد: زندگی یا مرگ! کدام تصمیم، مرگ را برایش به ارمغان میآورد، و کدام گزینش زندگی را؟
تاریخ بهنگام رسانی 29/09/1399هجری خورشیدی؛ 09/09/1400هجری خورشیدی؛ ا. شربیانی
Rating: really liked it
There are only two teams really - Team Edward and Team Insane 👀
(Sorry, got a little carried away)
Basically, this book is just me and Bella simping over Edward. My thoughts are incoherent cause of the sparkles ✨✨✨✨
Rating: really liked it
FIRE AND ICE
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if I had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice
ROBERT FROST
Still loving and still wishing I could be a werewolf. Of course, I would look ultimately more awesome 😉
Mel 🖤🐶🐺🐾
BLOG: https://melissa413readsalot.blogspot....
Rating: really liked it
Eclipse took what magic was in
Twilight and survived the boring but interesting
New Moon and killed it off with it's length, lack of imagery, inconsistencies, and lifeless characters.
The high school romance theme is COMPLETELY abandoned- we have the occasional, random scene since we need some build up to Bella's very boring graduation where she doesn't care. I think the high school theme is one of the reasons
Twilight was such a success, the reader was really in Bella's shoes as she solved Edward while attending school to provide a normal break. We sometimes read Bella studying for tests but that is only to pass the time until something supernatural happens, we never see the test nor does she feel ANY concern for her dismal grades. Heck, Bella doesn't even care about a paid stay at Dartmouth even if it's just a cover.
The writing dropped dead, like the book itself, and lost its magic- it was by no means great prose but it was descriptive and nice to read. Now we read: "It was amazing the amount of detail involved in the little figurine- the miniature wolf was utterly realistic". Well gee, thanks for that- couldn't Meyer have at least told us the wolf's pose?
Bella lost the traits that made her relatable and enjoyable- that made us feel that she was Edward's equal. She cares nothing for her parents or human friends, only visiting Angela- the first time we've seen one on one interaction between them- to avoid Edward and to appease Charlie, just so she meets her end of their deal and can be with her boyfriend. Though Bella was the only one to figure out that the intruder and the Seattle newborns were related which is meant to be a sign of her observance, it was so freaking obvious that I knew who was responsible for the newborns the day of the Eclipse Prom when I read the excerpt and knew who made the newborns, but Bella- by accident- only figures this out two days before the newborn attack. Bella whines about everything, referring to Edward leaving the house because of Jacob visiting as being childish and immature despite that we at least know how much they dislike each other and would gladly fight given the chance. She never thinks about how much she is hurting Jacob by keeping him around unless he tells that to her face. For some reason, every good character loves her, even Paul who tried to attack Bella before welcomes her (only joking about the bloodsucker stench). Then she becomes the housewife to Charlie, cooking his meals, cleaning the house as a pastime since Charlie didn't learn these skills in his 18 years of living alone nor when he had to care for his ailing parents after high school. "And you've given me
you. That's already more than I deserve, and anything else you gives me just throws us more out of balance". The most distressing change is that Bella continues to mope about how unworthy she is of Edward, despite that she had an epiphany at the end of
New Moon which finally made her understand that Edward loved her. Then there's marriage- though I understand the argument, I don't understand it coming from Bella. Hey stupid, your true love wants to MARRY YOU and yet all you can think of is the town gossip even though you will leave Forks and possibly only keep contact with your father while abandoning everyone else- so why does their gossip matter!? Bella only agrees to marriage so she can have human sex with Edward before he makes her a vampire; Bella wants sex with Edward while a human (offering to accept his proposal, let him pay for college AND a car, the floozy) but Edward only promises to try if Bella marries him, she agrees... but for the sake of sex because she is till disgusted by marriage. She is still Grumpy about parties, only complaining despite all the effort the Cullens have done for her.
Edward lost his suave, flirtatious, and mysterious charm that enchanted so many in
Twilight. He's so devoted like a lovesick puppy, that it's not charming. Edward either manipulates Bella to do what he wants (for her sake) or he lets her get her way- only when it concerns Jacob (after they fight of course), but Edward seemingly overcomes his very character and being to give Bella what she wants (which is a selfish and harmful want on Bella's part). I.e. He kept pressuring Bella to go to Florida (to avoid a werewolf/vampire fight for no good reason) and then tricked Bella into wanting to go by setting up an argument with her dad- that made me so mad. But despite how pathetic he was, the fact that he loves Bella so much that he won't even be mad with her despite the second kiss still won my pity- revoking all will and opinions for the sake of Bella just made me sick.
What used to be a cute, loyal friend with a crush is now an obnoxious, arrogant, sick boy. Jake forces himself on Bella and she breaks her hand when trying to punch the @$$ yet he still has the gall to put his arm around her and only say that Bella enjoyed it. When Bella gives him the cold shoulder later he merely acts exasperated. Then he does a hurt puppy act- actually pouting- when Bella is too distracted to pay mind to him when all he wants to do is give her a present. He later pretends that he plans to sacrifice himself to allow Edward to be with Bella- I actually bought this, thinking Jake's new tough attitude led to this moment- but as it turns out, it was all a plot to get Bella to kiss him. Between the two, I may actually want Jake for life since he has flaws and hobbies that a couple could work to overcome in their lifetime, but not now; he brought this on himself. Jake never acted like he truly loved Bella but rather that Bella was a trophy to prove Jake bested perfect Edward.
Their lovable traits have gone missing, leaving very dislikable characters behind whose flaws are either ignored or always forgiven.
On the few good sides we finally learn Jasper and Rosalie's past. Rosalie's was much more interesting to me since she was much more involved in the plot both in her bitterness and actions in
New Moon; also because she told Bella her story in a selfless effort to not only amend for her past behavior but try to convince Bella to stay human. I actually felt sorry for her- how she will never sit on a porch with Emmet watching their grandchildren play- it made my throat ache. Yet all Bella takes from the story is how Tanya was interested in Edward.
Jasper's wasn't very interesting- maybe it's because I wish I knew what he looked like beyond "tall, lanky, and blonde" or because as I read his flat story I kept wondering why Bella never noted a Texan accent- that certainly would have made him more interesting. Jasper's story just lacked any good descriptions or life, it was like reading
Interview with the Vampire but without the wonderful imagery or morale lessons- just imagine how dull that would be. But I am happy we learned about him as well as how he and Alice met the Cullens- it sounds so dang interesting; I wish Meyer will write a spin off about Alice meeting Jasper.
We also learn the werewolves past... it certainly wasn't as epic as I suspected. So much for natural enemies, werewolves and vampires only became enemies by accident.
Speaking of the werewolves- imprinting? Yeah, poor guys, being subjected to such a lame plot device. Meyer, in case you didn't know, imprinting is when a baby animal (most commonly BIRDS) label the first thing they see as their mentor and follow the thing (be it alive or not) as an example of how to survive. Even without being scientifically incorrect it is a bad idea and I felt no romance in there. I feel ill when I recall Bella seeing her relationship with Edward just like werewolf imprinting... that completely degraded their relationship and stripped it of love.
Seriously now, why can't the beloved, wonderful, and selfless Bella feel any sympathy towards Victoria who lost her beloved James because of Edward and Bella? Isn't Victoria's situation just like Bella's? Victoria isn't even treated as a villain, we never even see the newborns besides one who isn't at all the threat we wish we saw nor is she even acknowledged until about two days before the attack- she only speaks once and yells once, not even being remotely threatening.
Then there's the women, all besides Alice are pathetically devoted to their man. Let's count them: Bella, Renee, Esme with her first husband (she was abused but Meyer didn't have to do that), Leah, Victoria, Jessica, and even Lauren; which leaves Alice and Rosalie the only women to not be crazy without their men and leaves Alice to be the only strong female in the entire series (Rosalie wasn't as strong but better than the others). Look at Leah, her love couldn't resist being with Emily and now Leah is part of the pack and has to share thoughts with Sam, rather than make a strong woman who overcomes her pain and moves on we get a bitter harpy who can't even be nice to Jake for saving her life when she was being cocky, she instead seeks him out to complain how Jake's lovesick dreams of Bella annoy her and then reminds him of how Edward will most likely kill Bella- while smirking.
Every one of the books had a mystery-
Twilight had Edward,
New Moon had Jake, so Meyer tried to spin a mystery with who was making newborns and who is the intruder in Bella's room. With the intruder, Meyer did a good job confusing the characters with the Volturi option, making a decent argument to their possible involvement. The newborns receive the same treatment but nowhere as convincing. She constantly weaves through the two, trying to confuse us while making the characters so dim, none consider Victoria as an option until two days before the attack, and even then it was accident by rephrasing. The mystery was very bad and unlike the other two, it was so distant and uninvolved I never felt intrigued, especially since I knew the answer.
Only read for the sake of the series.
Rating: really liked it
Last year for the 10th anniversary of Twilight, I decided to read and recap (with the help of some wonderful people) that first Twilight book. This was something that I had already done with the ENTIRE Fifty Shades series, so I was expecting Twilight to honestly present us a chance to laugh more and Hulksmash less.
I was quickly proved wrong by Twilight and New Moon.
Eclipse was, if you can believe it, even worse. It's almost impressive how authors of terribly written abuse porn seem to up their own trash as the series goes along. Every time I asked myself how it could possibly get worse, Stephenie Meyer showed me how.
I'll spare you what has already been said a thousand times over about how badly written this book is. It's objectively low quality. Bella is a terrible narrator. She goes from being incredibly obtuse and not noticing #basic things like, I don't know, how her life is constantly in danger to noticing too much, like hearing entire conversations WHILE SHE'S SLEEPING. Cheatery narration litters the prose, but it's clear that the prose doesn't truly matter. Everyone, including the author, is here for Edward and Bella.
So, let's instead focus on three things here:
1- Bella and Edward's relationship is disgusting. Edward controls every single aspect of the relationship, including how and when Bella expresses her sexuality. He manipulates the crap out of her, keeping her from seeing who she wants to see or going where she wants to go. He plans cross-country travel to keep her from a party. He bribes her into a marriage by withholding sex and conversion, HE TAKES HER CAR APART TO KEEP HER AT HOME, Bella constantly makes comments about how she doesn't even know if she'll survive upcoming meetings with the supposed love of her life, Edward assigns members of his family to baby-sit (read: stalk) his girlfriend. There is literally no reason these two people should like each other and yet, here we are.
2- This is SO RACIST OH MY GOD. Meyer appropriates Native stories and legends only to call them GENETICALLY INFERIOR to the white vampires. There is a scene where she has Jacob telling one of the Quileute "legends" and it involves the Quileute LITERALLY BOWING DOWN TO A WHITE WOMAN. What's the purpose of that whole, 17 pages portion of the story? So that Bella, a white girl, can see her #firstworldproblems reflected in the story. Even just reliving that for a second makes me livid.
3- Jacob is also disgusting. His behavior is reprehensible in this story. He forces himself on Bella multiple times all leading to a kiss he gets by threatening suicide unless it happens. And that's when Bella realizes she also loves Jacob. What kind of message is that???? It hurts my heart that this is the YA that shaped a generation and that generation stills stands up for this. Rape-kisses do not a romantic love triangle make, dear friends. Jacob using his physicality to force Bella into situations she doesn't want to be in is not okay. Jacob emotionally manipulating Bella is not okay. Jacob being the worst is not an excuse for Edward to also be the worst.
It's very clear that Meyer is totally about this idea of not being able to help yourself or your love or your actions-- this is the book where the godforsaken concept of imprinting is introduced. No matter how much she tries to explain it as not totally effing creepy that a grown man follows an unwitting baby around until she's basically like Stockholmed into falling in love with him, Meyer will never make this concept okay with me. It's a giant representation for her entire series, though. The boy picks the girl and the girl sits there and takes his love, no matter what.
I don't know what else to say. It's book 3 and the plot IS STILL that Victoria is gonna come get and eat Bella, or whatever. They drag it out the entire book and every time something bad happens, it takes them multiple chapters to be like, "...could it be Victoria?" YES. IT'S ALWAYS VICTORIA. WHY ARE YOU SO DUMB?
There's an awful chapter in here where we get backstory about Rosalie and it's basically that she was gang raped. It has a TERRIBLE message that basically puts the blame of her rape on her beauty. And then Carlisle turns her because she's too beautiful to waste. None of this is addressed or refuted. It just happens and we wander quickly away to talk some more about Edward and Bella's stupid love.
Full recaps here.
Rating: really liked it
WHAT THE FUCK WAS THIS
*bathes in holy water*
The straights here need to get their shit together
Rating: really liked it
Book 3 in The Twilight Saga. Bella and Edward are back together, while Bella is struggling to hold on to her friendship with her very best friend, Jacob. There is also a new threat lurking on the horizon.
This was another very entertaining story in the series. Romance, action, and some great interplay and moments between the characters, especially Bella and Jacob. Jacob continues to grow on me more and more with each book. It was interesting to learn more about Rosalie and Jasper, and also the legends of the werewolves. Atmospheric as always in the small-town setting of Forks, Washington. I'm looking forward to the final book, Breaking Dawn.
